A Mother & Father’s Love…

Dearest DaShand,

It’s been over 14 years since you left us, yet the pain stings like it was yesterday. You left a void as wide as Lake Michigan and as tall as Sears Tower. Can you believe they call it Willis Tower now? So many things have changed since you’ve been gone.

We had our first Black president and he was from Chicago; Oprah moved her operation to Los Angeles, and the Chicago Cubs finally broke the Curse of the Billy Goat. You would have known all of the significant stats from their previous World Series win even though it was more than 100 years ago. We miss the way sports stats effortlessly rolled off your tongue. We didn’t need ESPN; we had you.DaShand Ray Bbal

We miss hearing your beautiful voice and seeing a smile that lit up the entire Universe. We miss creating memories with you. We miss you. We miss you…

Perhaps the most painful part of missing you doesn’t lie in the “What was”, but rather, the “What would have been.”

We miss watching you march across the stage as you accept your college diploma. Would DaShand's Prom 1996you have stopped after your Bachelor’s Degree or would we be calling you Dr. DaShand Ray by now?

We miss standing along side you as we build a successful family business, thus leaving a lasting legacy for generations to come. We miss holding your precious babies in our arms and spoiling them rotten as proud grandparents do. Would they look just like you?

We miss working with you in the community as we enrich the minds and lives of young boys and girls as we do with your oldest brother. We do so in your honor. You’d be proud.

We have no doubt that you would have continued on a path of greatness. You would have stumbled along the way, because to err is human. But no matter how many times you would have fallen you would have gotten right back up. And, you would have gone on to do some remarkable things.

The Ray Family

The “What ifs” and “What would have beens” ignite a pain that rips the heart and pierces the soul. The E2 tragedy took you, our sweet baby boy, but it also dashed your gigantic dreams and limitless possibilities.

Your being is as vivid in our minds now as it was the day you entered into this world. And we will continue to fight for your dreams as long as we have breath.


We love you,

Mom & Dad

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Filed under Love. Family. Feelings.

Funky, Wild, & Free (Hair)

People are obsessed with my hair. No, really. Obsessed! I rarely go a day without someone stopping me on the street to ask a question about my “funky” mane. Conversations typically go like this:

Obsessed Stranger: How long did it take to get your hair like that?

Disgruntled Tracee: About 13 years?

Obsessed Stranger: Ooh, your hair is so pretty. Can I touch your hair?

Disgruntled Tracee: Absolutely not.

Obsessed Stranger: Can you tell me how you get it like that?

And that’s where I go radio silent like Jack Bauer. If I explained my hair techniques to every Kim, Kate, and Mary that asked me I would be hoarse. So I decided to present you with a gift on this fine Thanksgiving. I’m going to show you in a few easy steps how to make your hair fun, wild, and free. Continue reading

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Wax On, Wax Off

TWO POINT FIVE YEARS AGO I lay on a not-so-comfy or friendly table in a cold, sterile room with a gaggle of men and women dressed in flimsy aquamarine-colored pajama-like gear hovering over me. They were preparing to surgically repair the torn meniscus in my left knee. The quirky anesthesiologist hurled inane questions at me in an attempt to quash my nerves (it didn’t work). She finally instructed me to count backwards from one hundred. I acquiesced. When I awoke from my forced slumber I was twenty pounds heavier.

Ok there’s a lot that happened in between the dashes, or rather, DIDN’T happen. But the point is my body was neither taut nor svelte. B.S. (before surgery) I was jumping rope like Floyd Mayweather and I did my fair share of push-ups, not the whiny baby girl kind. Times changed and P.S. (yes, post surgery) I could barely jump in the shower or push-up a bra. I became weak like Popeye without his spinach. Continue reading

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Brooklyn Teen Rock

YLE LogoIII’m proud of all of my success in the Entertainment Industry.  But I’m really proud of the work that I’ve done with teens in Brooklyn.  It’s work that is close to my heart and very necessary.  Continue reading


Filed under Radically Fabulous Memories

An Open Letter to The Donald

Dear Mr. Trump:

Thanks for effectively helping me cut down my reality TV viewing.  I love competition reality shows; I think they are awesome. And I often get swept up in the drama, tuning in every week to see which of my favorite singers will survive the battle rounds, which designers will be aufed, and which “celebrity” will be fired.  Well, thanks to you I no longer have to worry about the latter.  I simply don’t care.  I cannot continue to feed your pockets by supporting your television shows.  You’ve shown that you just don’t deserve it. Continue reading


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Confessions of a Homecoming Queen

The Royal Couple

Yep, you are in the presence of royalty…albeit H.S. royalty. Continue reading


October 12, 2012 · 1:13 am


People are really outraged by Stacey Dash’s endorsement of Mitt Romney. Admittedly, it is quite baffling why ANY woman would throw support behind two men who could care less about women’s rights. Continue reading

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Filed under Politics